Have you ever...

...had one of those "OMG I'm sooo thankful to see you but now stand there and let me beat you for making me soo thankful to see you" moments? That was a mouthful I know, feel free to go back and reread it slower this time...I joke, but in all seriousness, that was me. And Macon. Surprise, surprise.

It started out as a normal afternoon like all others in my Heathen filled household, with complaints about doing homework, wanting to watch tv, and sneaking snacks, but now I sit here with a pounding headache, red eyes, and a very much grounded 11 year old.

After doing his homework, Macon asked "Can I go ride my bike?" Which of course, I answered with "Sure". I feel like we should be past the point of me asking him a thousand questions before he walks out the door, as he has entered that realm of tween'hood, and I'm trying really hard to be a bit more lenient. But if you know me at all, you know my BIGGEST fear is something happening to my boys, more specifically, someone snatching them. Chris thinks I'm over protective....A term, I'm sure I used with my own mother at some point in time ;-), but really, if you watch the news then you know, it happens! So off he goes, to what I assume is, to ride his bike. An hour later, I've not heard from him and I don't see him in the cove anywhere.

Ok...calm....breath...he's Ok.

As Chris leaves for work, I ask him to ride around the neighborhood and find him...you know, to ease my mind as it's starting to get dark. Ten minutes later, there's no sign of him. At this point, Caleb and I jump in my truck to hit all the neighborhood kid's houses...still no luck. Now the panic is really starting to set in and I catch myself thinking the worse. Another lap around to our house and Chris joins us in the truck to help find him. One more stop at the friend's houses, a call to the girlfriend, still no sign of him. If you're a mother, then I'm sure you can understand the absolute terror and heartache that I was having at this moment, having searched every imaginable place, wondering where in the world my little boy was. Chris convinces me to go back to the house and calm down, because yes, I was crying and on the verge of calling the police...we had spent over 30 minutes looking for him and it was dark! What else was I going to do? Thankfully, at that moment, Macon called....I'm not sure what exactly he even said, but he was ok, and my fear switched to anger and I demanded he get his butt home.

Chris was outside when he rode up so I'm not sure what all was said at that point, but I do know that as soon as he walked in, I wanted to both hug and smack him for what he had just put me through. Our conversation hasn't fully happened at this point, as I'm taking this time to calm down, but I did get out of him that he was at the neighborhood behind AND across the busy road from us! Has he lost his mind?!?!?!

So here I sit, writing, hoping it helps both me AND him in the long run because I really hate to be "that" mom who shelters their kids from everything, and puts the fear of God in them, but what's a mom to do?!?! I realize it's only going to get harder...he's only going to get older and eventually he won't even tell me where he's SUPPOSEDLY going! I'm not sure I'll survive it...heck, I'm not sure he'll survive it at this point. Wish us both luck!